Thursday 24 September 2009

Friday 18 September 2009

last 20 minutes


I am currently into the last 20 minutes of the job I work. I don't know if I am supposed to be depressed, I am not leaving voluntarily. Maybe someone will have to drag me out. Probably not.
I wrote an email and sent it to everyone in the building. I won't post all of it, but here are some selections.
"Today is my last day. I finish at 2pm. I have been working in the Box Office for 18 months."
"You might see me wandering aimlessly through town, hands in my pockets, seemingly with nowhere to go. If you do spot me, and I look upset, don’t approach me as I might cry."
Whatever yeah.
10 minutes left.
If anyone wants to give me a job, I will definitely consider it.
Earlier I asked people "should I start a fire, take a shit on Kathleen's (my 'manager') desk, or punch an old lady?"
I never did decide.

Monday 14 September 2009

1 x end of the road festival ADULT ticket


The Elizabeth Etters Affair seems to have gone cold maybe. Would it be wrong of me to make the rest up? I want to know how the story plays out. Should I go to Canary Wharf with a copy of the email I was sent and Get-To-The-Bottom-Of-This?
Was invited to contribute to Piffle. And accepted. I think it will be an awkward relationship full of stilted conversation and unpleasant sex.
I had a weekend. In some ways it was fantastic and in other ways it was the worst I have ever felt. Emotionally speaking. And I had the house all to myself like Macauley Culking, only not as much fun. I started a fire. Not a big fire, but still a fire.
Preorders are available for the new Bureau De Books book QUESTIONS ABOUT LIFE AND SHIT. It is really good I think.
I have been going through my stuff and need to have a clearout. Ebay is calling me. Maybe you don't know, and why would you because I don't think I ever told you, but I used to run a shop of my own. It sold independent music and zines and other stuff. I now have boxes and boxes of this stuff that I can't get rid of. Would anyone like some? I have CDs and records and cassette tapes and zines and other things. If anyone would like stuff, and it'll be good stuff, you should paypal me some money to chriseast83@gmail.com and I will send you items worth at least 3 times the value of the money you send. (Minumum £5?)
Here is what it used to look like



Wednesday 2 September 2009

Poem of the century

I went to work
The wrong way
And got lost
No one would help me
I did not know what to do to get back

If I could buy a clue then I would but I have no cash on me so I am confused what

Take a picture
It'll last longer
But you don't have to
Though
If you had the photo
You might use it for bad things
An evil spell or something

How often do I have to say 'I love you' to trick you into believing it's true

I heart you
I lung you
I liver you
I small intestine the shit out of you sometimes

When you are sleeping
I take photos of you
And I photoshop the photos
So your eyes appear to be open
And you look like a corpse
Because baby
That's how I feel

On a good day I feel like a horse and on a bad day I feel like a mule
Today is somewhere between the two and it looks confusing