Monday, 6 July 2009

An open letter (no links)

Where do we go from here?

I feel like building a ladder so high that when it falls over and you are at the top you will crash into the earth at such a speed that you leave a crater the size of a supermarket carpark.

The question should not be "Where do we go from here?" but rather "Why the fuck should we bother?" and when you ask me that question I will give a small laugh then nudge you in the ribs with my elbow and say "You want we should take our shirts off and hug?"

Listening to mid-90s independant punk.

Planning a trip to Dublin and thinking "I hate it when people say things about how drinking Guiness in Dublin is awesome, as if I give a shit" but I will probably drink Guiness when I am in Dublin and I don't know how I will react. I think that if it as good as the hype then I will probably tear the skin off my forearm to find out once and for all if I am human or a Terminator. Seems like the only logical thing to do.

Do ghosts have sex? Do people have sex in heaven? Do people get to have sex with angels? Do angels have sex with eachother whilst dead people watch and nod their heads? If there is a really hot ghost in your room and you know it is a ghost but it looks really hot, would you have sex with it even though it is a ghost?

On the side of a new office building I want to paint the words 'you blew it' in 20foot high red letters. And dot the 'i' with a love heart.

How do I improve my signature? When a postman asks me to sign for a package I get really fucking embrassed by the scratchy mark I leave behind. Is it weird for me to think about girls and then spend an afternoon signing my first name followed by their surname?


xTx said...

i would have sex with a hot ghost (if i haven't already)

there had better be sex in heaven, or else, what's the point really?

An Unreliable Witness said...

I wish to apologise for the fact that after reading the first line of this post, I was trapped into a vicious cycle of repeat singing a Haircut 100 (ask your parents) song in my head.

Also: ghosts have sex. Of course they do. Chains are hot.

Mariana Soffer said...

Here is where do you go according to radiohead

Where do we go from here?
The words are coming out all weird
Where are you now, when I need you
Alone on an aeroplane
Fall asleep on against the window pane
My blood will thicken

I need to wash myself again to hide all the dirt and pain
'Cause I'd be scared that there's nothing underneath
But who are my real friends?
Have they all got the bends?
Am I really sinking this low?

About the signature I can lend you my trick, pretend you are a medical doctor, therefore you are entietled to have a terrible handrwritting, indeed you should. Or shust do a big unintelligible string of character look a likes, surrounded by a curve line. It is all about attitude.

Texas 'Tornado Hands' Paul said...

I thought this was excellent. I may print it out and fold it up.